On to my post: Deferred Gratification.Deferred. gratification. huh? What's that big ole' word?? That's me, that's Ry and I's lil' life right now.
Let me explain a little: That was one of my dad's favorite phrases to use in our home. He had a lot to say about "rewards " in life and how we get them. Everything from a shiny, new car when you turn 16 , to a hot, new pair of Lucky's from JMR ,( with 10 kids we never got a new car or jeans, we had to earn them) to getting a raise as a checker at "The Store", or becoming MVP on the sports team.. My dad would say," It takes work, and lots of it." To receive anything great in this life, it takes time and dedication." "That's deferred gratification kids, anything great in this world will mean putting off the immediate gratifications and working for something larger in life." So when you want to skip sports practice and go out with your friends , remember that having fun with your friends is gone the next day, but the lessons you learned from practice will stay with you and benefit you further."
My dad constantly reminded us teenagers that life was not handed to us in a basket, that if we wanted anything rewarding in life, we would have to work for it. I now fully understand what my pops meant. He said so many people make the mistake of wanting immediate gratification, not realizing what they are missing out on. If they put off the immediate rewards and worked harder, then they would reap so much more in life and receive such greater success.
This can represent so much in our lives on so many levels depending on where we are. I know I have used d.g. so many times in my life but one life experience that stands out was 10 years ago when Ry and I were first married. We were dirt poor, living off about nothing, raising twins , going to college and barely surviving! :) Ry would wake up and go to school from 7:00 a.m till 1:00 and then work from 3:00- 11:00 at night. I stayed at home full-time because we had brand new baby twins (weren't expecting two!!). I quit school and work to take care of the babies. We were both so tired from our own days and at night we were both up at least 3 times each to feed the twins....we were exhausted and worn out! My only "out" was when Ry would come home from school at 1:00 and watch the twins while I would go to the blessed outdoor pool and swim and swim in the sunshine! I had 45 minutes till he had to go to work. Those 45 minutes meant everything to me...Oh how I looked forward to 1:15 till 2:00. I was out of my small, lonely house and I was doing something for me! No babies, no bottles, nothing..just me. So one night when the twins were 11 months old, Ry came home so tired and I was crying from watching the twins for 22 hours by myself and we looked at each other and said,"what are we doing?? Are we out of our minds?? Life is so incredibly hard right now: Two babies, no money, no time for ourselves, for each other..What have we done?....Is this work worth all the sacrifrice we were making? Is this what we really wanted? We didn't have to have kids, I could be working and making money and we could have so many other immediate pleasures....are we sure we made the right decision? And, then, that darn phrase would come into my head: Deferred gratification. My dad would speak to me in my little moments of self pity and I would remember what Ry and I were doing: We were working and sacrificing for the bigger picture: a college education, a better career: a better life for our family. BINGO. Dad was right again. Thanks pops.
Today, I think of that word and I feel that I am experiencing another BINGO moment. We sign on our house on Monday. Finally the day has arrived....we started this adventure last May and finally, finally my deferred gratification is coming to fruition. Thanks dad. And thanks Ry for hanging in their with me.
Ry and I are still always striving for a better life, for bigger goals, to challenge ourselves, and to challenge the kids. Cheers to Deferred Gratification, I am thankful for you and thankful to reap your rewards. For all the many more d.g moments, I will be waiting.
Here are a few of my d. g moments:
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